its august already! i cant believe that im going to be 20 in just another 4 months, im not ready for adult's life :( hm hehe right now im already at my 11th week for my foundation and got 3 more weeks left before i finish it!!! looking back, i cant believe im going to enter degree in engineering, i seriously think that i was gonna be something else rather than an engineer. hahaha insyaAllah.
im always not good with introduction so sorry for acting like nothing happened. thats just how i am. im trying so hard not to bring myself down because of some things. mainly now im just focusing on how to get my life straight out. even with cutting people off, for my own happiness. i dont really care if some want to think my blog is some sad sad sad blog, seriously i like it. i think it as a way for me to tell my feelings. i dont really care if people read it, or not. i just write this to clear my head.
i used to write all the time, because it was my escapism. i would write my own poems, quotes and gave to my loved ones, but too often it was taken for granted. and also because i have a listener. or used to, so i had a listener. but now i like to keep things for myself and bella, never ever thought people are going to listen forever. because at some points, people get tired. they want something that excite them and when u couldnt provide it, theyre going to just throw u off.
when u gave ur best and still not being appreciated, never force urself to stay in that position. get out of the box: the box u created. take a big step, or even a big leap without thinking u'll fall because He will help us. why do we think that we have to take care of everyone's hearts?
and u. look at where u are now. without my help, ud be so lost right now just like u were 6 months ago. but then knowing i ll always stay by ur side, u put me last and others first. u never thanked me for the smallest things, for the things that i took care of, for the things that i ignored because I LOVE YOU. and now u wont look for me when im lost. i once had a great listener, but now i just feel like i am a burden. im tired, so tired of listening to ur pathetic excuses. there are so many great qualities on u, but its so funny when ure with ur friends, u suddenly become a dick.
xoxo
